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The “Proper” Way To Breakup

Dating + Relationships

The “Proper” Way To Breakup

Ahhh, Spring is here! The weather’s warmer, the flowers are in full bloom and, if you listen closely, you can hear the gentle sound of someone’s heart breaking. That’s right, the period of being booed up, we affectionately call, “Cuffing Season” has come to a close. Not only are the flowers are in full bloom, but your libido is as well. You’re ready to get out there and go a huntin’ for the first unsuspecting mammal in sundress or sweatpants. But hold on, tiger! Before you pounce, how about making sure your winter bae’s feelings are safely intact and you leave on a good note. To do this, you must learn the proper way to bid your boo, adieu!

There’s really not a better way to do this other than to just be a man or woman about it; in other words, keep it 100 and BE HONEST. ‘Winter Bae’ will respect you for this. They make not rock with you anymore and probably will never speak to you again, but at least they’ll respect you – and isn’t that what we all want at the end of the day? There are a couple of ways you can execute this. You can go the Donnell Jones, “Where I Wanna Be”, route and jedi-mind trick them to think that you jumping in the sea to check out other fish will only help your relationship. Only because you’ll be able to get all the lust and flirtatiousness out of you and you can fully be devoted to him or her. While the success rate and results may vary, I have seen it work on a couple of occasions with some friends of mine who will remain nameless to protect their necks.

Then there’s the “I Just Don’t Have Time to Be in A Relationship with All I Have Going on Right Now” route. You may have a lot on your plate like work, goals and other aspirations that take up a lot of space on your schedule to where you don’t have enough to give to them; and that’s not fair to either of you. Therefore, to avoid a potential explosion of a breakup down the line, it’s best to cut ties now and maybe see where you both are in the future and possibly rekindle.

Next is the foolproof, “Let’s Just Be Friends” approach. How many known that we could be better friends to Bae than a boyfriend or girlfriend? Letting this be known to Winter Bae makes the blow a little softer to bear and doesn’t make you look like a jerk.

All of these methods are much better than the popular Ghost method where you just become super distant and don’t answer calls or return text messages to where Winter Bae is left with no choice but to move on. Please have a little more respect for yourself and other party involved; it makes for a more harmonious world.

Thirst safely, my friends!

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