Courting these days has gotten so sketchy, fickle, and damn near non-existent. We’re falling head over heels, ready to sell the farm for someone without getting the full rundown on them, then looking like “Boo Boo The Foo” l when the skeletons start to come out of the closet and their true self emanates. And what’s the one thing that we’re always saying in the end? “Had I known in the beginning….” Well, as my father used to say, an ounce of prevention is worth more than a pound of cure. In other words, having more knowledge on a subject can help you better determine your next move. More specifically, asking the right questions of an aspiring mate makes all the difference between living happily ever after, dodging a bullet, or sobbing shoulda coulda wouldas. So, this article is going give you the questions you need to ask “Potential Bae” right out the gate to help you decide if you want to get in the car and take that ride or be like Tre, from Boyz N The Hood, and say “Lemme out, doe”.
Do You Have Kids?
A must to ask, not because it could be an automatic deterrent, but because it leads you, should you choose to go further, to ask the follow up question of what is his/her relationship with the mother/father. Knowing both makes for a smoother path down Relationship Road.
What is your Five-Year Plan?
Back in the day, this was a question I would scoff at like “How do I know what I’m going to do in five years?!” or “Anyone can “plan” what they want to do with their life, but does it actually happen?” But as I’ve grown, I’ve come to respect this question because now we are choosing for life, not just for a good time, and want something more concrete and realistic.
What are your religious views?
Because I doubt you’d want to bring an atheist or devil worshipper home to your God-fearing, Momma.
What is your living situation?
For this, I would caution you not to judge or be quick to run if he/she lives at home with a family member, it could be for various reasons. You’ll be able to decode the sincere ones with a plan from the fraud lame leeches.
What are your family values?
The mindset and family background can play a huge role in the relationship dynamic: How do they feel about marriage? Do they want kids? How’s their relationship with Mom/Dad/Parents?
What are your financial goals? (How do you feel about budgeting? Saving?)
One of the main reasons for the demise of a relationship are finances. This question should be in your top 3.
Do you have many of friends of the opposite sex?
This is a good gauge test because there are many who aren’t cool with their mate fraternizing with them once they’re in a relationship and will want you to cut it back. You can then decide if YOU would be cool with that.
What are your political views?
If that’s not really your thing, do you at least vote?
What’s your vice?
Not that you’re judging, but that you just want to know what you’re getting into, because nowadays you must ask. This can range from smoking weed to swinging.
What are your interests?
The simplest question of all because you DO NOT want to end up with a weirdo who lives for Star Wars movies and Game of Thrones…not that there’s anything wrong with that. *smirk*